As I sit here this afternoon at Deweys (it should be Dewey’s, but the sign painter screwed up; three times) on Shaker Square and watch the people filter in and out, I’m catching up on email. One piece I’m reading is the second issue of Marge Piercy’s newsletter which leads with this morning-after poem. So, how many bores have you kissed?

I vow to sleep through it

I hate New Year”s Eve.
I remember the panic to have
something, anything to do,
some kind of date
animal, vegetable, mineral,
a giant walking carrot,
a boa constrictor, a ferret,
an orangutan, a lump of coal.

I remember ringing apartment
bells on 114 th Street
looking for a rumored party.
Parties with lab punch:
Mogen David, grapefruit juice
and lab alcohol, hangovers
guaranteed to anyone within
ten yards of the foaming punchbowl.

I wake the next morning
with my mouth full of mouse
turds and wood ashes.
I wake and remember
how I tried to demonstrate
the hula, my hips banging
like a misloaded washer,
how I necked with a toad.

I remember limp parties,
parties askew, everyone
straggling home with the wrong
mate, the false match.
Evenings endless and boring
as a bowling tournament
at the senior center.
Is it midnight yet?

Only nine thirty? Only
nine thirty-eight? At midnight
we will spill drinks on
each other”s clothes, kiss
the boors and bores we detest,
the new year like a white
tablecloth on which a drink
has already been spilled.

The hard question is, of course, how many times was I the bore, and how many times was I the boree?

My Soundtrack: Spy by Nyles Lannon on WOXY.

These reflect my traffic from the change to Word Press on 21 March 2005.

Well, things didn’t change much on the national and international scene in 2005, but here’s wishing all of my friends and readers a happy and successful 2006! Thank you all for stopping in, for reading, and most of all, for challenging me to be a better writer each and every day.

This is a real simple one. Last night at VirtualLori’s first 39th birthday party (I’m sorry, I think the fact that I was mistaken as her mother’s new husband proves my point, she can’t really be that old), Democracy Guy told me that he liked the way I was posting the virtual menorahs. I thanked him and said it was a Hanukiah.

What’s the difference? Well, all Hanukiahs (in Hebrew: Hanukiot) are menorahs, but not all menorahs are Hanukaiot. The distinction is in the number of branches. In Hebrew, menorah (hrvnm) translates as lamp or candelabrum. The best known example of this was the Temple Menorah described in Exodus 25:31-40:

25:31 And thou shalt make a candlestick of pure gold: of beaten work shall the candlestick be made, even its base, and its shaft; its cups, its knops, and its flowers, shall be of one piece with it. 32 And there shall be six branches going out of the sides thereof: three branches of the candlestick out of the one side thereof, and three branches of the candle-stick out of the other side thereof;

33 three cups made like almond-blossoms in one branch, a knob and a flower; and three cups made like almond-blossoms in the other branch, a knob and a flower; so for the six branches going out of the candlestick. 34 And in the candlestick four cups made like almond-blossoms, the knobs thereof, and the flowers thereof. 35 And a knop under two branches of one piece with it, and a knob under two branches of one piece with it, and a knob under two branches of one piece with it, for the six branches going out of the candlestick.

36 Their knobs and their branches shall be of one piece with it; the whole of it one beaten work of pure gold. 37 And thou shalt make the lamps thereof, seven; and they shall light the lamps thereof, to give light over against it. 38 And the tongs thereof, and the snuffdishes thereof, shall be of pure gold. 39 Of a talent of pure gold shall it be made, with all these vessels. 40 And see that thou make them after their pattern, which is being shown thee in the mount.

In the illustrations below, the one on the right is a Temple Menorah. The one on the left, with eight branches and a central light is a Hanukiah.

But if, strictly speaking, Tim was right and the photos are of a menorah, why did I make a point of telling him it was a Hanukiah? Because I love words and I think that names are important. The more specific we are about what we mean to say, the better everyone’s understanding will be.

My Soundtrack: Lose That Dress by Versus on WOXY.

What do you do if you have 3,000 refugees camping outside your office? If you’re the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees you call in the riot police who, after water cannons fail to move the refugees, move in with swinging batons. How do you move in a blink from doing nothing to water cannons and batons? And 27 dead.

From this morning’s Washington Post:

A three-month standoff between Sudanese refugees and Egyptian authorities climaxed in bloodshed early Friday when club-wielding police invaded a refugee squatter camp, setting off a melee in which at least 20 and perhaps 26 Sudanese were killed.

Some refugees fought back, using tent poles as weapons. An Egyptian Interior Ministry statement, which acknowledged 12 deaths, said 74 police officers were wounded. Officials blamed the deaths on a stampede.

My Soundtrack: You by Rogue Wave on WOXY.

Is there a boy (or girl) who at some point in there life did not play Cowboys and Indians, Cops and Robbers, or some variation thereof? Jewish children have a special reserve in this game universe: Maccabees and Syrians. In a world where you might be the bully’s target, you get to kick serious Greek butt.

One of my favorite Safam songs is Judah Maccabee. It’s opening lines run:

Oh when I was a boy
My one and only joy was pretending
I was living in the past.
So to get my little thrills
I’d storm down from the hills
A wooden sword held tightly in my grasp.

I know that weapons as gifts are politically incorrect, but would it hurt so much to give wooden shields and swords to our kids so that they too could storm down from the hills?

My Soundtrack: The Clown by Elefant on WOXY.

One of the classes that tremendously informed my understanding of the Bible focused on Jack Miles’: God, A Biography. Miles’ thesis was that the order of the texts in the Hebrew canon tells the biography of God; beginning with the very present god of Genesis and steadily declining until Job where God speaks in the present for the last time.

And then we get Esther, a book where God isn’t even mentioned.

Esther is the story of how a wily Jewish leader outwits an evil politician bent on genocide. The story of the Maccabees is a lot like that. This time the conflict is military and brutal, but the core of the story remains the same, as the old joke runs: they tried to kill us, we won, let’s eat.

And like the book of Esther, God’s name is nowhere to be found in either First or Second Maccabees.

Maybe that’s part of the reason the books didn’t make it into the canon. Mordechia was no Maccabee. He prevailed without the overt presence of God, but it was because of his intelligence, not because of his sword arm. Somehow that’s safer when you’re living in the Diaspora.

Judah, Jonathan and Simon were a dangerous bunch. They didn’t negotiate and dialog. They fermented violent revolution against the prevailing government. If you’re living as a tiny minority in a country, that’s not the kind of precedent you want the majority populace and leadership to be thinking about.

As the lights of the candles grow brighter and brighter, I have to think that the message of Clausewitz was true: war is a continuation of policy by other means. We need both Mordechais and Judahs to make the system work.

And not calling out the name of God every time things get tough isn’t such a bad idea either.

My Soundtrack: Lose That Dress by Versus on WOXY.

This morning in my effort to keep my readers informed on the continuing genocide in Darfur, I linked to an Op-Ed piece by sens. Barack Obama (D-Il.) and Sam Brownback (R-Kan.) in Tuesday’s Washington Post. There they imply that as bad as the genocide is, it is still under some kind of control:

If the United States does not change its approach to Darfur, an already grim situation is likely to spiral out of control.

Marisa Katz responds today in the online version of The New Republic to say that:

Their sentiment is admirable. Yet the violence in Darfur has been going on for so long now that it takes a lot to get people’s attention. And unfortunately the senators don’t make much of an effort. They retread the same old banal appeals to decency, they go out of their way to couch any hint of criticism in diplomatic politesse, and they ensure their most meaningful idea is lost in a long list of proposals. It’s a perfect example of how not to halt a genocide.

And in a companion piece, Eric Reeves points to a root cause for the genocide — the National Islamic Front in Khartoum — and suggests that until the World’s governments are willing to address the masters of the genocide, no amount of humanitarian aid will solve the problem.

…as the genocide enters its fourth year, the international community continues to defer to Khartoum, or even to suggest disingenuously that the regime has somehow reformed itself. Either way, the clear implication is that the lives of Darfur’s civilians are not worth the diplomatic price of confronting Sudan’s brutal leaders.

There is no more appalling illustration of this phenomenon than recent announcements by the African Union and the Arab League that both groups will hold their upcoming summits in Khartoum. These summits will represent symbolic triumphs for Sudan’s genocidaires. And they will reinforce in very public fashion what Khartoum already knows: that none of its neighbors really cares what it does in Darfur.

Among political publications, The New Republic has consistantly published articles alerting its reader to the ongoing genocide in Darfur.

But there is no oil in Sudan. There are no precious or strategic minerals hidden beneath its sands. There are only hundreds of thousands of powerless people in the depths of the worst kind of poverty. What could the United States gain by expending tens or hundreds of billions of dollars to achieve regime change in this impoverished nation?

A soul.

My Soundtrack: On A Freezing Chicago Street by Margot & The Nuclear So & So’s on WOXY.

2005 could be the year that just keeps giving for President George Bush, the Republican Party, America and the World. It’s important to remember that it was the Republican leadership that went to the White House and told President Richard Nixon to resign because they saw the damage he was doing to the party.

I don’t usually do the foody thing — I love to cook and give dinner parties, I’m just not into the whole sharing recipes thing — but my dad sent this to me this morning and after a little surfing I think I’ve found enough sources to convince me that this is real. One source says you can freeze these. I love the idea of making and freezing uncooked omelets.

Crack two, large or extra-large eggs into a quart-sized Ziploc freezer (very important) bag.

Add whatever omelet ingredients you like such as vegetables, cooked meats and cheeses to the bag.

Seal the bag, being very careful to squeeze out as much air as possible, and then shake to mix the eggs and ingredients.

Drop the bag into a pot of rolling, boiling water for exactly 13 minutes.

One large pot may accommodate six bags. For more omelets use additional pots of water.

Lift the bag out with tongs and open carefully to avoid burns from escaping steam (think microwave popcorn).

The omelet will roll out easily onto the waiting plate.

Enjoy.

If you try this at home, let me know how it works out and any alterations you may make. I’m going to give it a whirl this weekend.

And just think, with a bottle of chilled champagne and several bag-o-omelets in the fridge, you’ve got the perfect late night snack or morning-after breakfast just waiting to be shared.

My Soundtrack: Make Sure They Hear by Mark Eitzel on WOXY.

Most of us know that Hanuka lasts eight days because that was the time it took to make new oil for the Menorah. Except that story doesn’t appear in First or Second Maccabees. That piece of information surfaces nearly 300 years later in the Talmud (Shabbat 21b). So why do we celebrate for eight days?

Micha Berger offers one suggestion:

…according to the book of Maccabbees, the first Channukah was originally seen as an oportunity to congregate at the Temple in lieu of the just-missed Succos-Shmini Atzeres.

The entire discussion is fascinating. Enjoy.

My Soundtrack: Rature by Pedro The Lion on WOXY.

[Update — 1454, 29 December — In what I can only describe as an amusing at best and distrubing at worst bit of comment snarking by people apparently using IP addresses assigned to Alaska Air are jumping on Jeremy Hermans. I say apparently because, as one commenter writes, a hacker who knows what they’re doing can spoof an IP address. Since Hermanns didn’t attack Alaska Air or make allegations that it was incompetent, I have to wonder where the snarkiness is coming from?]

Jeremy Hermanns was on board Alaska Airlines Flight No. 536 when it lost cabin pressure at 30,000 feet. Thanks to well-trained pilots, prepared cabin staff and methodical mechanics, the plane quickly descended to 10,000 feet and returned to Seattle’s SeaTac to make a safe landing. Hermanns took in-flight photos and quickly posted them.

Jeff Jarvis takes note of the way Hermanns, KGW and the Seattle Post-Intelligencer cover the event.

My Soundtrack: This Is The Night by The Weird Sisters on WOXY.

It’s been a busy week in Wally World: the universe’s source for cheap plastic crap. Well, I haven’t read the sales reports yet on the Chrismakwanzanhuka Holiday season, but if my stroll with an empty baskart through the Cleveland Heights Wal Mart is any indicator, don’t expect the senior staff to be turning any cartwheels.

WORKING FAMILIES FOR WAL MART… With backing from Wal-Mart Stores Inc., a group of community leaders — from clergy to Latino activists to businesswomen — announced the formation Tuesday of a national group to speak up for the world’s largest retailer and launch counterattacks when they sense criticism is unfair. Keep reading…

SOMEBODY NAB MARTIN LUTHER… Lorem Labs is granting indulgences from independent merchants to their cusomters who shop at Big Box stores. Somehow I think that most retailers might not be as willing to be forgiving as Matt Mankins of Lorem Ipsum Books. Keep reading…

WHO’S LEADING… After posting about the Working Families For Wal Mart yesterday, I, like Jonathan, thought I would do a little more digging. Bishop Combs is a busy, busy man. I found the following on one of his websites describing his political affiliations. Keep reading…

HOW YOU SAY IT IS IMPORTANT… As evidenced by the attempts by Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice to finesse the Bush Administration’s use of torture, the precise way that you say anything is critical. Here’s what Wal Mart has to say about the group Working Families For Wal Mart. Keep reading…

WHO’S LEADING, CONTINUED… Continuing my look at the members of the steering committee of the Bentonville Behemoth”s astroturf group Working Families For Wal Mart, I pulled up the website of Florida legislator Jennifer Carroll. Keep reading…

HIDING BEHIND A WAL… Transparency is important in the age of the Internet. It’s also very easy to be opaque, if you so choose. Here at The Writing On The Wal we publish our real names. At Working Families At Wal Mart, however, they’ve chosen to hide behind a proxy Wal. Keep reading…

WHO’S LEADING, PART III… Third in an on-going series looking that shills that the Bentonville Behemoth have gathered together in it’s astroturf organization: Working Families For Wal Mart. This morning I took a look at Carroll Cochina, head of the Native American Chamber of Commerce and, by her own claims, one-third Native American. You do the math. I can’t. Keep reading….

WHO’S LEADING, PART IV… Fourth in an on-going series looking that shills that the Bentonville Behemoth have gathered together in it’s astroturf organization: Working Families For Wal Mart. This morning I took a look at Maria de Lourdes Sobrino, a successful entrepreneur whose business model fits Tom Peters’ prescription for eating Wal Mart’s lunch. Keep readnig…

THE WAL MART THEORY… While surfing my Watch List on Technorati I discovered Grayden, a 21-year-old living and working in Burnaby, British Columbia. Grayden is wound tight over some policy changes at his place of employment. The source of his ire? Something he calls The Walmart Theory: Keep reading…

My Soundtrack: The Engine Driver by The Decemberists on WOXY.

Too bad he’s never cried. That’s No. 1 on the list of facts about Chuck Norris that I found while reading about an angry young man upset with The Wal Mart Theory. I remember Norris best from watching his movies in the ’70s while I was in the Navy. I always liked him better than Stalone, but I really can’t tell you why that is.

With deference to Paul Harvey, it’s time for the rest of the story. The Hanukah tale we tell our children, and ourselves, stops in the middle, with the end of First Maccabees where the menorah is relighted in the Temple. But that’s when the story begins to get really interesting with a couple innovations: alliances and popular elections.

We all know the story of Judah Maccabee: a David for a later age. But we dont’ talk much about the two brothers who outlived him: Jonathan and Simon.

It was Jonathan who took up the mantle of leadership when Judah died in 160 BCE. It was also Jonathan who renewed the alliance with Rome and established an alliance with Sparta. Those alliances opened the doors to the Romans who would eventually take control and rule Israel for several centuries.

When Jonathan was executed by Trypho in 142 BCE, Simon, being the sole remaining son of Mattathias, became the leader. And here another strange twist occurs. Simon is elected to be both high priest and secular ruler (the title king is carefully avoided) of Israel. This is the first time that both religious and political leadership are invested in one man since Moses.

The Dynasty begun by Simon continued for more than 100 years and ended in 40 BCE when Mark Anthony captured and executed the last of the line.

My Soundtrack: Rature by Pedro The Lion on WOXY.

Here in Cleveland we think we’re put upon when some comedian makes a burning river joke. But my dad sent me this clipping which was used on Jay Leno last night. It could be worse, I suppose. Instead of a fast-food job the poor citizen could have landed a dream nightmare job working for the Bentonville Behemoth.

As a correction in this morning’s New York Times notes, Vice President Dick Cheney’s fascination with undisclosed locations continues: …Although images of the White House and its environs are now clear in the Google Earth database, the view of the vice president’s residence in Washington remains obscured. What ya’ hiding from , Dick?

In an attempt to use an evil-Republican-plot version of my-dog-ate-my-homework a University of Massachusetts student set off an Internet firestorm of finger pointing. But people spotted too many holes in the story and under close scrutiny, it fell apart. The student now confesses that he made up the whole thing. Score one for the Chairman.

As I was driving up I-77 this morning I was tuned to WCPN, 90.3 FM and listening to Diane Rehm. Normally I turn off the At Noon show but today there was a special that sucked me in. Rabbi Ismar Schorsch, Chancellor of the Jewish Theological Seminary, makes my point about the true meaning of Hanukah better than I ever could.

Holiday Haiku

Warrior princess Rice
becomes Bush voice of reason
in one charming year