18 March 2007

FROM MY CHAPBOOK…

0400 by Jeff Hess

My name is Jeff Hess and I’m a biblioholic. I own hundreds of books. Not valuable books, mostly Science Fiction paperbacks and text books, tomes rescued by the bag from library book sales. A few years ago, in the interest of not burying myself, I began reading more books from the library and taking notes. My electronic chapbook was born.

This is a passage I copied from A Strategy For Daily Living by Ari Kiev.

Prepare a general schedule the night before, but approach each day in a relaxed way, letting things emerge and evolve as the day goes on. Above all, seek activities that I enjoy. When I finish one activity, move on to another.

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17 March 2007

MUCKING OUT THE BLOGPILE…

1400 by Jeff Hess

I’m constantly tossing interesting websites into what I call my blogpile. Some of them find their way here in the form of regular posts, but more often than not they languish and get buried deeper in the pile. The end result is that I have to go back and do a bit of shoveling. Today’s item is 57 Tips for Writing Your Term Paper.

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17 March 2007

FROM MY DAD…

0800 by Jeff Hess

I could never bring myself to forward all the email jokes, cartoons and other Internet comedy that land in my inbox. But then I started posting the ones my dad sends me. Judging from my comments and emails, my dad has become one of my greatest blogging assets. So for your morning blog chuckle I present: From My Dad.

A plane is about to crash. There are five passengers on board, but there are only four parachutes.

The first passenger says: “I am Ronaldo, the best football player in the world. The football world needs me, and I cannot die on my fans.” He grabs the first parachute and jumps out of the plane.

The second passenger, Hillary Clinton, says: “I am the wife of the former president of the United States; I am the senator of New York and I have a good chance of being president of the United States in the future.” She grabs a parachute and jumps off the plane.

The third passenger, George W. Bush, says: “I am the president of the United States of America. I have huge responsibilities in the world. Besides, I am the smartest president in the history of my country and can‘t shun the responsibility to my people by dying.” He grabs a pack and jumps off the plane.

The fourth passenger, the Pope, says to the fifth passenger, a young school boy: “I am old. I have lived my life as a good person as a priest should and so I shall leave the last parachute to you; you have the rest of your life ahead of you.”

To this the little boy says: “Don‘t fret old man. There is a parachute for each of us! The smartest president of America took my schoolbag,”

Posted in From My Dad | 2 Comments »

17 March 2007

FROM MY CHAPBOOK…

0400 by Jeff Hess

My name is Jeff Hess and I’m a biblioholic. I own hundreds of books. Not valuable books, mostly Science Fiction paperbacks and text books, tomes rescued by the bag from library book sales. A few years ago, in the interest of not burying myself, I began reading more books from the library and taking notes. My electronic chapbook was born.

This is a passage I copied from A Strategy For Daily Living by Ari Kiev.

Concentrate first on activities related to the objectives that are most important to me. Much can be accomplished in a short time if I devote myself to my highest priorities.

Keep track of time expended in activities so that I can better monitor my daily routines. Don”t succumb to the feeling that I have insufficient time to do what I want. If I focus on my major objectives, I will minimize or halt those activities that have no real importance.

I will be increasingly free of the pressure to pursue less important activities.

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16 March 2007

ENYA, ANYWHERE IS…

2359 by Jeff Hess


Eyes to die for.

I walk the maze of moments
but everywhere I turn to
begins a new beginning
but never finds a finish
I walk to the horizon
and there I find another
it all seems so surprising
and then I find that I know

Chorus:

You go there you’re gone forever
I go there I’ll lose my way
if we stay here we’re not together
Anywhere is

The moon upon the ocean
is swept around in motion
but without ever knowing
the reason for its flowing
in motion on the ocean
the moon still keeps on moving
the waves still keep on waving
and I still keep on going

Chorus

I wonder if the stars sign
the life that is to be mine
and would they let their light shine
enough for me to follow
I look up to the heavens
but night has clouded over
no spark of constellation
no Vela no Orion

The shells upon the warm sands
have taken from their own lands
the echo of their story
but all I hear are low sounds
as pillow words are weaving
and willow waves are leaving
but should I be believing
That I am only dreaming

Chorus

To leave the thread of all time
and let it make a dark line
in hopes that I can still find
the way back to the moment
I took the turn and turned to
begin a new beginning
still looking for the answer
I cannot find the finish
It’s either this or that way
it’s one way or the other
it should be one direction
it could be on reflection
the turn I have just taken
the turn that I was making
I might be just beginning
I might be near the end.

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16 March 2007

MUCKING OUT THE BLOGPILE…

1400 by Jeff Hess

I’m constantly tossing interesting websites into what I call my blogpile. Some of them find their way here in the form of regular posts, but more often than not they languish and get buried deeper in the pile. The end result is that I have to go back and do a bit of shoveling. Today’s item is 25 Sites We Can’t Live Without.

Interestingly enough, I’ve only visited six of the 25, and only half of those on a regular basis.

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16 March 2007

WELL, FITZGERALD’S NOT DOING ANYING NOW…

0847 by Jeff Hess

Robert Reich Vblog March 13, 2007 on Vimeo

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16 March 2007

FROM MY DAD…

0800 by Jeff Hess

I could never bring myself to forward all the email jokes, cartoons and other Internet comedy that land in my inbox. But then I started posting the ones my dad sends me. Judging from my comments and emails, my dad has become one of my greatest blogging assets. So for your morning blog chuckle I present: From My Dad.

I’ve taken the liberty of putting your name into the drawing for a 7 night cruise around the Bay of Islands on the ‘Gypsy Queen’ Cruise Liner.

All airfares, transfers, food and drinks inclusive; with dinner at the captain’s table as his personal guest. Good luck, I hope you win! Attached is a picture from the brochure…


Nothing is too good for my friends!

(My dad sent this one to me because my grandfather’s (his father’s) cabin cruiser was named Gypsy Queen.

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16 March 2007

CRATER, EARHART, HOFFA MYSTERIES SOLVED…

0636 by Jeff Hess

The political fright is all a twitter over the confessions beaten out of Khalid Sheikh Mohammed. Not only did he mastermind the attack on 11 September, but he also personally beheaded journalist Daniel Pearl, murdered Joseph Crater, shot down Amelia Earhart and buried Jimmy Hoffa in the end zone of Giants stadium.

The last three are, of course, lies. But knowing what we know about the effectiveness of beating a confession out of someone, I have no more confidence in what the administration of President George Bush trotted out yesterday in a lame attempt to distract our attention from his Attorney General Alberto Gonzales problem than I do in my own fictions.

Mohammed may be guilty of some, or all, of the crimes he confessed to, but we will never know because expediency won out over sanity.

Is it 2009 yet?

Posted in Election 2008, Operation Iraqi Freedom | 2 Comments »

16 March 2007

FROM MY CHAPBOOK…

0400 by Jeff Hess

My name is Jeff Hess and I’m a biblioholic. I own hundreds of books. Not valuable books, mostly Science Fiction paperbacks and text books, tomes rescued by the bag from library book sales. A few years ago, in the interest of not burying myself, I began reading more books from the library and taking notes. My electronic chapbook was born.

This is a passage I copied from A Strategy For Daily Living by Ari Kiev.

Work to improve that which I do best and most readily. As much as possible, rely on myself to accomplish the goals I have set for myself.

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15 March 2007

THE WRITING ON THE WAL RADIO ALERT…

1506 by Jeff Hess

A few weeks ago the American Public Media show Marketplace contacted The Writing On The Wal for information it needed on Wal-Mart’s computer-run scheduling system for its employees. Marketplace was particularly interested in BBC American. We just got a note from the segment’s producer that it will air this evening.

Click here to listen to the streaming audio.

Posted in Walmart | 4 Comments »

15 March 2007

THE OTHER BUSH BROTHER… STEVEN…

1404 by Jeff Hess

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15 March 2007

MUCKING OUT THE BLOGPILE…

1400 by Jeff Hess

I’m constantly tossing interesting websites into what I call my blogpile. Some of them find their way here in the form of regular posts, but more often than not they languish and get buried deeper in the pile. The end result is that I have to go back and do a bit of shoveling. Today’s item is 100 things we didn’t know last year.

Posted in Blogpile | 2 Comments »

15 March 2007

FROM MY DAD…

0800 by Jeff Hess

I could never bring myself to forward all the email jokes, cartoons and other Internet comedy that land in my inbox. But then I started posting the ones my dad sends me. Judging from my comments and emails, my dad has become one of my greatest blogging assets. So for your morning blog chuckle I present: From My Dad.

GOD’S COFFEE

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life. Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups — porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite — telling them to help themselves to the coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said: “If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.

Be assured that the cup itself adds NO quality to the coffee. In most cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups….. And then you began eyeing each other’s cups.

Now consider this: Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain life, and the type of cup we have does not define, nor change the quality of Life we live.

Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee.” God brews the coffee, not the cups. Enjoy your coffee!

“The happiest people don’t have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.”

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15 March 2007

FROM MY CHAPBOOK…

0400 by Jeff Hess

My name is Jeff Hess and I’m a biblioholic. I own hundreds of books. Not valuable books, mostly Science Fiction paperbacks and text books, tomes rescued by the bag from library book sales. A few years ago, in the interest of not burying myself, I began reading more books from the library and taking notes. My electronic chapbook was born.

This is a passage I copied from A Strategy For Daily Living by Ari Kiev.

“The first thing to learn in intercourse with others is non-interference with their own particular ways of being happy, provided that those ways are not assumed to interfere by violence with ours.” William James.

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14 March 2007

MUCKING OUT THE BLOGPILE…

1400 by Jeff Hess

I’m constantly tossing interesting websites into what I call my blogpile. Some of them find their way here in the form of regular posts, but more often than not they languish and get buried deeper in the pile. The end result is that I have to go back and do a bit of shoveling. Today’s item is Wikisummaries.

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14 March 2007

WAL-MART WEDNESDAY…

1000 by Jeff Hess

It’s been a busy week in Wally World: the Universe’s source of cheap plastic crap. On The Writing On The Wal — the blog USA Today says should be on its readers’ radar — Jonathan Rees, Robert Feinman, Peter Sayles and I continue our work dedicated to drawing back the curtain on the Bentonvile Behemoth’s corporate disinformation and other flackery.

UNFORTUNATE HEADLINE OF THE DAY… Sometimes you read the headline way too fast. Sometimes you”re scanning and you see what you want to see. And sometimes you just spew coffee over your computer screen when the mistake strikes you. In this case the mistake is all mine, not Wal-Mart”s. Keep reading…

HEAD THE PLUMBER GETS A NAME…
Wal-Mart Plumber Bruce Gabbard has stepped into the spotlight and given an interview to the Wall Street Journal. And guess what? Gabbard says he did it because of all the pressure he was under to plug those dastardly leakers, er leaks. Keep reading…

GNOMES INVITE UNIONS TO THE TABLE… Later today Bank of America will host a conference call for investors on Wal-Mart and two of its biggest critics: Paul Blank from Wakeup Walmart and Jason Judd from Change To Win on convincing Wal-Mart to improve pay and benefits for workers. Keep reading…

GNOME CALLS BULL SHIT… This morning I posted briefly about Bank of America”s intention to sponsor a conference call between investors and two of Wal-Mart”s most vocal, pro-union critics: Paul Blank from Wakeup Walmart and Jason Judd from Change To Win. Keep reading…

AT THE WALLY PLEX… There are sound stages on Hollywood”s back lots smaller than Bentonvile”s behemoths, so it”s no surprise that budding video talent has been sneaking cameras in at odd hours. And now for the midnight show at the Wally Plex featuring annieis2cool. Keep reading…

WHEN THE SOLUTION IS PART OF THE PROBLEM… A few days ago Jonathan asked the question: What percentage of Americans boycotts Wal-Mart on principle? I”ve been pondering that question this morning in light of a conversation I had with one of my students yesterday. Keep reading…

DO WELL… GET $22 MILLION… Wal-Mart CEO Lee Scott had a good year. At least the Wal-Mart board members thought so. They were so happy with Scott”s performance, and the fact that the company reached its 2006 revenue targets, that they awarded him a sweet $22 million stock bonus. Keep reading…

GIVING BACK WHAT YOU NEVER HAD… Wal-Mart may have gotten, at a minimum, a load of goodwill from Cleveland for giving back something that it never had, and, it now appears, something to which it wasn”t even entitled. It passed on a $10 million tax abatement on it”s Steelyard Commons Supercenter. Keep reading…

HOW DO YOU INTERCEPT A TEXT MESSAGE…? In the wake of the Wal-Mart plumber”s firing, that”s the question some people were asking last week. With so much of our communications flashing through the ether, who knows who else is listening and reading? Slate offers some insights. Keep reading…

I LIVE IN WALLY-WORLD… I am so depressed. Ohio, the state that gave the world powered flight; the state where Cleveland was once second only to New York and Chicago; the state once known as the birthplace of presidents; the state of my birth has devolved into the state where… Keep reading…

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14 March 2007

OH NO…! NOT THE DOGMA RAY…!

0854 by Jeff Hess

Posted in Maths, Science & Technology, Music Videos, Superstition & Ignorance | No Comments »

14 March 2007

FROM MY DAD…

0800 by Jeff Hess

I could never bring myself to forward all the email jokes, cartoons and other Internet comedy that land in my inbox. But then I started posting the ones my dad sends me. Judging from my comments and emails, my dad has become one of my greatest blogging assets. So for your morning blog chuckle I present: From My Dad.

(Given my experience of late in tracking down Internet quotes, I’d say that maybe, if I’m lucky, 10 percent of these are actually quotes. But they’re fun, nonetheless.)

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself: “Lillian, you should have remained a virgin.” — Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter)

I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: “No good in a bed, but fine against a wall.” — Eleanor Roosevelt

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement. — Mark Twain

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible. — George Burns

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. — Victor Borge

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. — Mark Twain

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher. — Socrates

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. — Groucho Marx

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. — Jimmy Durante

I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back. — Zsa Gabor

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. — Alex Levine

My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying. — Rodney Dangerfield

Money can’t buy you happiness… but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery. — Spike Milligan

Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was SHUT UP. — Joe Namath

I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything until noon. Then it’s time for my nap. — Bob Hope

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. — W.C. Fields

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. — Will Rogers

Don’t worry about avoiding temptation. . as you grow older, it will avoid you. — Winston Churchill

Maybe it’s true that life begins at fifty … but everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out. — Phyllis Diller

By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he’s too old to go anywhere. — Billy Crystal

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14 March 2007

FROM MY CHAPBOOK…

0400 by Jeff Hess

My name is Jeff Hess and I’m a biblioholic. I own hundreds of books. Not valuable books, mostly Science Fiction paperbacks and text books, tomes rescued by the bag from library book sales. A few years ago, in the interest of not burying myself, I began reading more books from the library and taking notes. My electronic chapbook was born.

This is a passage I copied from A Strategy For Daily Living by Ari Kiev.

“The essential characteristics of the gentleman are the ability to put oneself in the place of others, the horror of forcing others into positions from which he himself would recoil, and the power to do what he feels to be right without considering what other may say or think.” John Galsworthy.

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