With apologies to June Carter Cash.

SALSA is a burning thing
and it makes a fiery ring
I ate to my heart’s desire
then came the ring of fire

My RECTUM turned to a burning ring of fire
I went down,down,down
and the flames went higher.
And it burns,burns,burns
THE RING OF FIRE
THE RING OF FIRE

My ROIDS turned to a burning ring of fire
I went down,down,down
and the flames went higher.
And it burns,burns,burns
THE RING OF FIRE
THE RING OF FIRE

The TASTE of salsa’s neat
but it burns on the toilet seat
DAMN those Mexi-can’s
for the pain here on the can

My BOWELS turned to a burning ring of fire
I went down,down,down
and the flames went higher.
And it burns,burns,burns
THE RING OF FIRE
THE RING OF FIRE

The fried ice-cream didn’t put out the fire
I went down,down,down
and the flames went higher.
And it burns,burns,burns
THE RING OF FIRE
THE RING OF FIRE

MMMM Maaaaa I’m bitin the town
Honest Ohhhh man, No it’s sad
ehh, but the fire went wild…

I could never bring myself to forward all the email jokes, cartoons and other Internet comedy that land in my inbox. But then I started posting the ones my dad sends me. Judging from my comments and emails, my dad has become one of my greatest blogging assets. So for your morning blog chuckle I present: From My Dad.

When a character of mine is talking, let me listen to him and write down what I hear. Let me describe him, not with phrases dimly recalled from other books, but as I perceive him. p. 248

Found in my electronic chapbook.

From Telling Lies for Fun and Profit: A Manual for Fiction Writers by Lawrence Block.

The Buddhist monks of Myanmar marched quietly and begain what many hoped would be a saffron revolution that could bring down their country’s military dictators. The revolution failed and many of the monks were beaten, inprisoned and murdered. Some fled. Thirty-eight came to the United States. Only eight still cling to their vocation.

From Reuters:

The few remaining monks are clinging to their vocation in this rundown former textile mill town some 240 miles north of New York City, trying to adapt.

Among them is U Gawsita, who sits quietly in an English class, still wearing his robes, one of many immigrants learning U.S. history in Utica.

At dawn he prays with three fellow monks crammed into one floor of a clapboard house, now his makeshift monastery. But Gawsita, 30, who is seen rousing monks with a bullhorn in the Oscar-nominated film “Burma VJ,” showing on U.S. cable channel HBO this month, is part of a dying breed.

Some 38 monks were granted asylum in the United States soon after the Saffron Revolution, the 2007 protests during which barefoot, shaven-headed monks shielded and led civilians to march against rising fuel prices which snowballed into the biggest challenge to military rule since a 1988 uprising.

Today, just eight remain monks.

“The monks couldn’t survive here. They were forced to change, to become regular civilians,” a soft-spoken Gawsita said in a recent interview surrounded by Buddhist flags and a montage of photos including Nobel Peace Prize winner and Burmese pro-democracy icon Aung San Suu Kyi.

Where are the American Buddhists? Where are the people who flock to hear the Dalai Lama speak? Hell, where it the Dalai Lama?

This really does work. I’ve tried it several times and it worked every time.

Thought For The Day.

If you feel like doing some work, sit down and wait.

The feeling does go away.

I could never bring myself to forward all the email jokes, cartoons and other Internet comedy that land in my inbox. But then I started posting the ones my dad sends me. Judging from my comments and emails, my dad has become one of my greatest blogging assets. So for your morning blog chuckle I present: From My Dad.

Help me Lord, to be as honest as I”m capable of being every time I sit down at the keyboard. p. 248

Found in my electronic chapbook.

From Telling Lies for Fun and Profit: A Manual for Fiction Writers by Lawrence Block.

I’m not sure how I feel about members of Congress taking unilateral action as regards United States policy toward Myanmar. Would I be of a different opinion if John McCain were in the White House? Quite possibly. Foreign policy is always tricky and our Constitution invests that power in our Executive. My bad for not reading closely enough.

From Mizzima:

US Congressman Joe Crowley led a bipartisan introduction of a bill yesterday to renew America”s targeted sanctions against Burma”s military regime by extending the Burmese Freedom and Democracy Act, a statement said.

Crowley”s effort to obtain a sanctions renewal came two weeks after the European Union renewed its own targeted Burma sanctions.

After introducing the legislation, Crowley, a six-term Democrat representative from New York, issued a statement in which he said: “It is abundantly clear that we need tougher, and a more robust application of, sanctions on Burma, and we need to start soon because the Burmese regime continues to commit crimes against humanity and war crimes against its people.”

He also expressed his concern that Burma”s military rulers had “completely rejected true co-operation” with Aung San Suu Kyi and the National League for Democracy to whom he referred as the “legitimate leaders of Burma”.

As the Burmese Freedom and Democracy Act was endorsed by powerful politicians from both Democratic and Republican parties it is very likely that the bill will pass before the current sanctions expire in July. Last year Republican Senators John McCain and Mitch McConnell supported renewed sanctions as did Democrat Senator Diane Feinstein and several other influential members of her party.

His statement accused the regime of continued abuses of human rights beyond the point of criminality and called for an international probe over those crimes.

This is a line I need to consider more closely.

Roldo Bartimole writes:

It looks as if Republican John Kasich”s desire to make money on Wall Street after leaving political office will haunt his candidacy for Ohio Governor. The Columbus Dispatch Thursday reports that Kasich tried to sell two Ohio pension funds some Lehman Bros. investments.

The Dispatch also reported that former Democratic Ohio Treasurer Richard Cordray dumped $800 million in toxic investments when he took office in 2008. Some of the state’s savings by Cordray had been invested with Lehman Brothers.

A worker in Cordray”s department noticed what the Dispatch described as “risky short term investments” made by the previous state administration. Cordray quickly got rid of the investments within weeks. Cordray is now the Ohio Attorney General.

While many believe Republican “outsiders” have good chances of defeating Democratic office-holders this election year, it looks as if Kasich”s work on Wall Street could trump the voters desire to get rid of “insiders.” Gov. Ted Strickland has been quick to paint his Republican opponent as a Wall Street money-maker.

1319: John Kasich tours Ohio in 28,000 lbs. of moving symbol of political hypocrisy

WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:

Men Are Just Happier People — What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack.

You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5,000. Tux rental $100. People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them. New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $12.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes — one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can do your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

I could never bring myself to forward all the email jokes, cartoons and other Internet comedy that land in my inbox. But then I started posting the ones my dad sends me. Judging from my comments and emails, my dad has become one of my greatest blogging assets. So for your morning blog chuckle I present: From My Dad.

Lord, help me to remember that I”m not in competition with other writers. Whether they have more or less success has nothing to do with me. p. 248

Found in my electronic chapbook.

From Telling Lies for Fun and Profit: A Manual for Fiction Writers by Lawrence Block.

Myanmar’s military dictators, who are exchanging their uniforms for suits and ties to demonstrate that they’ve really, really changed, have told the United States that we, and the rest of the world are just going to have to trust them to deliver a fair election in the fall. I have to wonder how Kurt Campbell kept a straight face.

From Time Magazine:

Burma’s military leaders have rejected international poll monitors for the country’s first elections in 20 years but asked for unspecified cooperation from the United States in supporting the vote, official media said Wednesday.

An official urged the U.S. to “show a positive attitude” about the military-organized vote, even though American envoy Kurt Campbell had already expressed deep concerns about the elections ahead of a recent visit.

Riiggghhhhttttt…

It’s been a busy week in Wally World: the Universe’s source of cheap plastic crap. On The Writing On The Wal — the blog USA Today says should be on its readers’ radar — Jonathan Rees and I continue our work dedicated to drawing back the curtain on the Bentonvile Behemoth’s corporate disinformation and other flackery.

CHICAGO WALMART FIGHT NOW STATEWIDE… Ohio is not Cleveland and Illinois is not Chicago. If you lived in Cleveland, you”d swear there was no way Ohio could go for George W. Bush. Twice.* So, if Walmart can”t beat the Chicago politicians, perhaps it can do an end run with the governor”s race. Keep reading…

MEANWHILE, IN NEW YORK CITY… The trifecta of Chicago, New York City and Baltimore are rapidly consuming a great deal of my attention as Walmart pushes back hard against locals who really don”t think that a Walmart in their neighborhood, or city, is a solid plan for economic growth. Keep reading…

SAVE MONEY, LIVE BETTER IF YOU”RE WALMART… When was the last time that any Walmart shopper was able to say they saved $1.67 million dollars? Never. But if you”re Walmart and can wield that big stick, that”s how much you can shave off your local taxes and can threaten to take your store and play elsewhere. Keep reading…

COULD THERE BE A WALMART BUBBLE…? I realize that the economic allusion is wrong, but reading Andrew Winston”s piece about how fecking big Walmart is made me think about all our discussions since 2008 about businesses too big to fail? What could make Walmart collapse? Keep reading…

NEW ZEALANDERS READ ABOUT BETTY DUKES… Forget the aw-shucks downhomeness Walmart is an international company with an international image and international problems. There are no Walmart stores in New Zealand, yet journalists there consider the story of Betty Dukes to be important news for their readers. Keep reading…

LIES AND MYTHS WILL NOT GO AWAY… In only the latest example of lazy journailsm, Domenick Rafter goes to the Walmart website to discover how good the pay is at Walmart. What Rafter, like many before him, miss is just how few Walmart employees are full-time. Keep reading…

WHAT ARE THE UNINTENDED CONSEQUENCES…? Walmart, like any corporation, goes where the customers are and acts solely in the interests of its shareholders. That”s why a story in the New York Times about Walmart transforming agriculture in that giant nation set my hairs on end. Keep reading…

WALMART HOSTING CHICAGO JOB FAIR… Less than an hour ago as I write this a Walmart-sponsored job fair opened its doors at the House of Hope Church at 752 East 114th Street in Chicago, only a few blocks from the proposed Walmart Pullman development. Keep reading…

DEAR WALMART… Walmart would like the world to believe that given their choice, New Yorkers would welcome the Bentonvile Behemoth with open arms, but all those nasty union thugs are denying New Yorkers their right to retail choice. Uh, I don”t think so. Keep reading…

ABOUT THAT JOB FAIR… Yesteday I wrote about the Walmart informational job fair sponsored in one of the neighborhoods where Walmart deperately needs to open a second store or see its urban strategy collapse. As I predicted, Chicago”s broadcast media were all over the event. Keep reading…

Just as the United States of America has both The Star Spangled Banner and America the Beautiful, so too does Israel have Hatikvah and Yerushalayim Shel Zahav. In many ways the unofficial anthems of our two countries say more about us than those we have chosen to first represent us.

Last evening we gathered at the Phoenix Coffee House on Mayfield road to invest 90 minutes in exploring the question:

How can we know when to distrust an expert?

The question quickly split into two question: first, who is an expert, and second when do you know to distrust the opinion of someone you’ve identified as an expert?

Generally we suggested that an expert is someone who has dedicated significant time and energy to examine all aspects of an area of study and who, through some recognized process, has become recognized by their peers.

The second part of the question, we discussed issues of credibility — is the person compensated in some real way for investing their expert opinion in some specific way; are they paid to by those with an agenda to take a pro or con position expressing their expert opinion, and we also considered if an error in a known area of the observer disqualified that expert in areas not known by the observer.

We spent some considerable time on when we choose to distrust an expert. Points were raised concerning the consequence of that trust — trusting a neurologist about the need for surgery vs. trusting a music reviewer on whether or not to purchase a new CD — and also the whether a difference between an opinion and a judgment exists.

I allow that an opinion is generally less considered, but make a distinction between an uninformed opinion — professional basketball is a silly undertaking — and an informed opinion — all writing is rewriting.

While I am generally loathe to resort to the dictionary because dictionaries are descriptive rather than prescriptive, they reflect the common view of language at the time of publication, I have opened my Merriam-Webster 10th Edition in this case.

Opinion: a view, judgment, or appraisal formed in the mind about a particular matter; a belief stronger than impression and less strong than positive knowledge. Judgment: a formal utterance of an authoritative opinion.

I think the use of authoritative opinion fits nicely with my own understanding of what would make an informed opinion, one I would consider as worthy of examination.

So, what do y’all think?

Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly.

One student said to his friend: “I’m sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that.”

The other student says: “No, I don’t think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome. He walks slowly and his legs are apart just as we learned in class.”

Since they couldn’t agree they decided to ask the old man. They approached him and one of the students said to him: “We’re medical students and couldn’t help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn’t agree on the syndrome you might have. Could you tell us what it is?”

The old man said, “I’ll tell you, but first you tell me what you two fine medical students think.”

The first student said, “I think it’s Peltry Syndrome.”

The old man said, “You thought. But you are wrong.”

The other student said, “I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome.”

The old man said, “You thought. But you are wrong.”

So they asked him, “Well, old timer, what do you have?”

The old man said, “I thought it was gas. But I was wrong, too!”

I could never bring myself to forward all the email jokes, cartoons and other Internet comedy that land in my inbox. But then I started posting the ones my dad sends me. Judging from my comments and emails, my dad has become one of my greatest blogging assets. So for your morning blog chuckle I present: From My Dad.

For starters, help me to avoid comparing myself to other writers. I can make a lot of trouble for myself when I do that, sliding into a routine that might go badly. p. 247

Found in my electronic chapbook.

From Telling Lies for Fun and Profit: A Manual for Fiction Writers by Lawrence Block.

It is difficult to imagine a water shortage in a country where the rain falls for weeks, months at a time, but it is dangerous to underestimate the capcity of human engineers to totally fuck up a local ecosystem for profit. In the 21st century, potable water is rapidly becoming the blue gold of the world’s economy.

From the Democratic Voice Of Burma:

Lakes and freshwater wells in central Burma are drying up, fuelled by hot weather and abnormal river flows resulting from hydropower projects.

A local in Sagaing division”s capital, Monywa, said that wells were drying up in every ward of the city. “The well in our ward dried up and now everyone is out of water,” he said.

Water levels on the Irrawaddy river and its largest tributary, the Chindwin river, which flows through Sagaing division, are low, and sand banks are appearing with increasing frequency.

The Mekong river, which supports millions of people from China to Cambodia, is at its lowest level in nearly half a century, largely as a resulting of heavy damming by the Chinese.

Remember the Aral Sea…

Roldo Bartimole writes:

You who are paying close attention may have noticed that in my last posting here I said that a Gateway official told me that – despite a contrary mention in a New York Times article – Progressive Field was NOT getting a re-do.

Well, apparently that”s not true. Sorry about that.

Crain”s Cleveland Business this week reports that the Cleveland baseball team will soon announce an agreement to make “significant changes to the ballpark.” As I said in the original post, who knew? Apparently, not us, the owners and taxpayers.

Apparently, the ball park owner, Gateway Development Corp., which you and I heavily helped pay to build, didn”t know either. Gateway said today it has not been advised of the changes. Crain”s knows but the owners don”t. Is that the way it”s supposed to go?

Bill Reidy, retired partner of Price Waterhouse Coopers and a former city law director, is chairman of the Gateway board. Cuyahoga County and the City of Cleveland have representatives on the board.

I guess the Cleveland Indians and owner Larry Dolan make the decisions without much consultation with the owners Continue Reading »