0807 by Jeff Hess
It looks like that for 18 months of good behavior, Rush Limbaugh’s long drug nightmare might be coming to an end. According to the New York Times: Limbaugh’s attorney said: Mr. Limbaugh and I have maintained from the start that there was no doctor-shopping, and we continue to hold this position.
Do you think Limbaugh’s stand on drug offenders will now soften? Me neither.
My Soundtrack: Tied Up Too Tight by Hard-Fi on WOXY.
Posted in Culture, Social Justice & Advocacy, Superstition & Ignorance | 8 Comments »
0741 by Jeff Hess

24 April: 13.11 gallons @ $2.899/gallon = $38.00
Posted in From My Dad, Impeach Bush, National, Politics | 4 Comments »
1928 by Jeff Hess

Yes it does. And it looks like Democratic candidate Betty Sutton isn’t one. An attack ad circulating in support of Sutton features a photograph of her opponent, Capri Cafaro that was stolen from blogger
Scott Bakalar. The photo on the left is from the attack ad. The photo on the right was taken and posted by Scott.
Sutton need to apologize and pay Bakalar the going rate for the use of the photograph.
NEO bloggers are understandably ticked. Is it too much to ask for intelligent and honest Democratic candidates?
Brewed Fresh Daily provides the link to email Betty. Here’s what I said:
Shalom Ms. Sutton,
How ironic that the campaign literature attacking Cafaro”s honesty has to feature a stolen photograph.
You”re right. Ohio does deserve honest leaders. It just doesn”t look like you”re one of them.
B”shalom,
Jeff Hess
hess@havecoffeewillwrite.com
http://www.havecoffeewillwrite.com
My Soundtrack: Your Beauty Is A Knife I Turn On My Throat by Eagle*Seagull on WOXY.
Posted in Blog Theft, Ohio, Politics | 2 Comments »
1042 by Jeff Hess
Jimi Izrael deconstructs the Duke/Rape case and skewers Captain Save-A-Ho and Skrippology. Like sausage making in reverse the process lays all the components on the table and gives readers a chance to move beyond sound bites and photo ops. Jimi slaps all those involved upside the head and gives a lesson on the game as well.
Posted in Culture, Social Justice & Advocacy | 2 Comments »
0909 by Jeff Hess
Only two members of Ohio’s delegation to the House of Representatives have signed on to H.R. 723: Rep. Sherrod Brown (D-13) and Rep. Tim Ryan (D-17). On the Senate side of Congress, both Sen. George Voinovich and Sen. Mike DeWine are co-sponsors of S.R. 383. What’s wrong with this picture? Where are the rest of our representatives?
Posted in Darfur, Ohio, Politics, Social Justice & Advocacy | No Comments »
0720 by Jeff Hess

Blogfather Dave Winer and videoblogger Amanda Congdon sit on a park bench to talk about blogs, the blogosphere and journalism 101. His point about amateurs is good. There was a time when being an amateur wasn’t about ability, it was about money. You did it for love, not cash, which put you a step above the professionals. Thanks Tish.
Posted in Blogging, Writing | No Comments »
1536 by Jeff Hess
One of the things President George Bush is known for is his almost fanatical loyalty to his friends. But it does seem that there are friends and then there are friends. Tom DeLay probably thought he was on the latter list, but as this paragraph from today’s New York Times shows, he was really on the former. Chin up Tom, there’s still bugs.
Mr. Bush also called for repealing several hundred million dollars in subsidies, also in the energy bill, for an industry-run deepwater drilling research center in Sugar Land, Tex. That project’s biggest champion was Representative Tom DeLay, the former House majority leader whose district includes Sugar Land.
Could there be a better name for a DeLay project than Sugar Land?
My Soundtrack: Red by Elbow on WOXY.
Posted in Impeach Bush | No Comments »
1453 by Jeff Hess

Tens of thousands, and possibly hundreds of thousands, of Americans will gather in Washington, D.C. this Sunday, 30 April, to demonstrate for action to stop the genocide in Darfur. Anyone who thinkgs that the killing will stop at the borders of Darfur or Sudan or Chad has already drunk the Koolaid. This global threat demands a global solution.
Posted in Darfur, International, Mark Fiore, Politics, Social Justice & Advocacy | No Comments »
1134 by Jeff Hess
If you are a whale-shit-sucking waste of human genome, then gay bashing is acceptable. But if you’re a DINO Democrat running for an Ohio House of Representatives’ seat, it’s probably a bad idea as blogger Faggoty Ass Faggot has proven. Brian posted about a nasty little piece of campaign literature from candidate Bill Ritter and then…
Posted in Cleveland, Politics, Social Justice & Advocacy, Superstition & Ignorance | No Comments »
1044 by Jeff Hess
Campaign rhetoric is meaningless. The only way you can truly know what is in the soul of any politician is by their record. Gubernatorial candidate Ted Strickland and senatorial candidate Sherrod Brown showed themselves this week when they voted against their constituencies and for the check-writing special interests.
From Bill Callahan comes this:
The entire COPE Act, essentially unchanged from what the subcommittee marked up two weeks ago, was just approved by the full Energy and Commerce Committee 42 to 12. Eleven Democrats and one Republican voted against it.
Rep. Sherrod Brown and Rep. Ted Strickland voted for the final bill.
Yes, the bill that effectively wipes out community oversight of the cable industry. The bill that will allow nationally franchised video/Internet providers to redline neighborhoods and create “tiers” of Internet service. The bill that undermines net neutrality and threatens to end the Internet as we know it. That bill. They voted yes.
Which means next week I’m going to vote for anyone but Strickland and Brown. And come November, if they win their primaries, I will again vote for anyone but Strickland and Brown. And if that means that Kenneth Blackwell and Mike DeWine win their elections, then so be it.
Better a politician you can trust to do the wrong thing than a politician you can’t trust.
My Soundtrack: Test Transmission by Kasabian on WOXY.
Posted in Ohio, Politics | 4 Comments »
0918 by Jeff Hess
From today’s Writer’s Almanac comes this 17th century poem that I cannont help but hear Billy Joel’s Only The Good Die Young playing in the background. Is there a guy alive who didn’t try running this line on the object of his lust when he was young and stupid? (Yes, I know. That is redundant.)
To The Virgins, To Make Much Of Time
by
Robert Herrick
Gather ye Rose-buds while ye may,
Old Time is still a flying:
And this same flower that smiles today,
Tomorrow will be dying.
The glorious Lamp of Heaven, the Sun,
The higher he’s a getting;
The sooner will his Race be run,
And nearer he’s to Setting.
That Age is best, which is the first,
When Youth and Blood are warmer;
But being spent, the worse, and worst
Times, still succeed the former.
Then be not coy, but use your time;
And while ye may, goe marry:
For having lost but once your prime,
You may for ever tarry.
The real question is: did it ever work?
My Soundtrack: Opposite Ends by The Crimea on WOXY.
Posted in Poetry | No Comments »
0121 by Jeff Hess
It’s been a busy week in Wally World: the universe’s source for cheap plastic crap. In our last installment the Bentonvile Behemoth was rethinking its corporate culture and Lee Scott had gone fishing. This week Michagan’s attorney general hits the company with a piddly little $1.5 million fine and I take Wal Mart’s side in a civil lawsuit.
FALLING PRICES… From Worth 1000. Keep reading…
TEAM WAKE UP… The crew at Wake Up Wal Mart. Keep reading…
POCKET CHANGE… When you”re the world”s largest retailer, actions like this one are about as bothersome as an upside down warning label on your bottle of Chardonnay. The Bentonvile Behemoth”s profits were $11.2 billion in profit in 2005. Keep reading…
ANOTHER PANEL FOR WAL MART… Under continued pressure over it”s labor practices, Wal Mart yesterday named former Detroit mayor Dennis Archer, the first black president of the American Bar Association, and Latina civil rights activist Vilma Martinez as the first members of its Diversity Panel. Keep reading…
I HOPE WAL MART WINS THIS ONE… Five years ago a registered sex offender lied to Wal Mart on his employment application and was hired as a an associate. In that capacity he approached a then 10-year-old girl and grabbed her buttocks. The incident was captured on tape and Wal Mart fired him. Keep reading…
MAY DAY…! MAY DAY…! I”ve written elsewhere that I think the mass protests in the United States next Monday will be counter-productive for several reasons, but here”s an angle that I hadn”t considered. Mexicans are planning boycotts of U.S. companies that do business in Mexico. Keep reading…
My Soundtrack: Girlshapedlovedrug by Gomez on WOXY.
Posted in Walmart | No Comments »
1248 by Jeff Hess
It’s hard for me to believe that it was 26 years ago. That night Duane Weaver and I sat up listening to the radio and talking little. We waited to hear what President Jimmy Carter would say at 7 a.m. EDT when he addressed the nation about an obscure spot southeast of Tehran labeled Desert One.
I remember the uncontrollable laughter that came after news that we were not about to go to war with Iran. Both Duane and I were recently discharged Navy veterans. I had spent the final days of my tour in the Gulf of Oman on point guard for the naval taskforce there. We’d managed to do our tours and come out whole. Neither of us had liked the prospect of going back into the shit.
This month’s Atlantic puts those events on its cover. As I’m reading it my 12-hour watches as the engagement controller for the after missile battery come back. It was the perfect example of military life: interminable stretches of boredom punctuated by moments of bowel watering terror.
And I think of the sailors now on Gonzo Station who are reading the news about the Mullahs and their nuclear saber rattling. Many of these men, and now women, were not yet born when I was heloed off the fantail of the Billy B and headed home. They trust their training and their shipmates; when you hear This Is Not A Drill, General Quarters, there is nothing else.
Will they have to finish what we began on 4 November 1979? I hope it doesn’t come to that. But that is what we all signed on to do. And there is honor in that.
My Soundtrack: Breakdown by Handsome Boy Modeling School on WOXY.
Posted in International, Politics | 5 Comments »
1043 by Jeff Hess
RoboRen 5 from Worth 1000.
Pablo Picaso’s Don Quixote (left) has always been one of my favorites, but it was Grant Wood’s American Gothic (right) that grabbed me in this contest.
My Soundtrack: Crooked by Wussy on WOXY.
Posted in Culture | No Comments »
1023 by Jeff Hess
There may be only one thing writers dislike more than math and that economics. When it comes time to earn-out your book and dealing with production and promotion costs we generally just want it to all go away. And that’s a bad thing. If you don’t understand how you’re really making your livelyhood, you’re probably not going to make it.
From Live Journal blogger Anna Louise comes a longish, but worthwhile, post tagged as demystifying publishing.
A lot of editors don’t care enough, aren’t interested enough, or don’t think they are good enough at math.
Most of the time, this has nothing to do with math. Most of the time, a P&L is about figuring out which numbers to plug into an excel spreadsheet.
While our excel spreadsheet is 100% proprietary, I am going to give you a basic rundown of the things that we include in our P&L. Every company includes this stuff in their P&L.
We are going to do two fake P&Ls. These are totally made up, but the numbers are real. For the sake of argument, we are going to make a P&L for a mass market original, and we are going to make a P&L for a book that goes from hardcover into mass market. For the sake of argument, the mass market P&L will be a negative P&L, while the hc/mm P&L will be a positive/neutral one.
This in no way should imply anything to do with reality. I just don’t want to have to do out the numbers for four P&Ls to show two positive and two negative. Savvy?
Savvy, thank you Anna
My Soundtrack: Little Eyes by Yo La Tengo on WOXY.Materials requested on 25 April for pickup on 28 April
Posted in Blogging, Fiction, Writing | No Comments »
1804 by Jeff Hess
The choice of headline was Salon’s, not mine. I think the image of Sen. Mike DeWine running scared is wishful thinking on the part of triumphant left-wing Democrats. I really, really hope that come 2007 that Mike DeWine is no longer one of my senators, but we are not going to see that happen if we start believing our own propaganda.
From Salon’s Walter Shapiro:
So when I sat down with DeWine last Tuesday in suburban Worthington to talk about his tricky reelection battle against antiwar Democratic Rep. Sherrod Brown, I was not expecting fireworks. But the sky rockets went off as soon as the topic turned to embattled Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld.
Rumsfeld has made some very serious mistakes, DeWine declared, repeating his verdict for emphasis. Very serious mistakes. I think history will judge him very harshly. Just to make sure that I was really hearing one of the harshest attacks yet on Rumsfeld by a Republican senator, I asked, Which mistakes? DeWine, who has never repented his 2002 vote for the Iraq war, gave me a what-planet-are-you-on look before responding, Clearly not enough troops going in [to Iraq]. That was the biggest mistake. And a lot of mistakes would be covered under that.
That’s not running scared. That’s a savvy member of one of the world’s most elite clubs recognizing that President George Bush’s star has crashed and burned and that anyone standing too close is going to get scorched. We Democrats need to stay focused. It ain’t over until it’s over.
My Soundtrack: Who Cares by Gnarls Barkley on WOXY.
Posted in Ohio, Politics, Social Justice & Advocacy | No Comments »