December 30th, 2017

Michael Harriot, writing in The 2017 Wypipo Awards opens the envelopes. My favorite was:

In the category, Becky of the Year, the candidates are:

1. Taylor Swift: For making another album all about how Kanye did her wrong, getting caught in a lie, stealing the essence of Beyoncé, whitewashing it, making ”Unsweetened Lemonade” with it, releasing it on the anniversary of Donda West’s death and saying nothing about becoming the white supremacist poster child.
2. Tomi Lahren: This Beckzilla shaded Auntie Maxine, Beyoncé, Wale, Colin Kaepernick, Glenn Beck, an entire airline and black people in general.
3. Lena Dunham: For using her unique brand of hipster racism shit-baggery, which includes kicking a puppy to the curb and defending an alleged rapist. Basically, for being Lena Dunham.
4. Kellyanne Conway: For playing a major role in the election of Mango Mussolini by lying her ass off.

And the winner is: Sarah Sanders Huckabee.

Sarah Sanders Huckabee broke the glass ceiling, and I’m not just saying that because she’s the new-millennium Kool-Aid man. Never before in the history of lying motherfuckers has anyone shown this level of boldface bullshittery. As the Trump administration’s mouthpiece, she parses out fake news like Willy Wonka on Halloween. When it comes to lying, she’s the GOAT…

And by that, I mean she’s a lying goat.

The rest are just as spot on. Pour an adult beverage of your choice, sit back, read and enjoy…

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